Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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