Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
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Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
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