White coat. Heels.
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
