Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
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