i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Your cock deserves a montage
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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