Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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