Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Randomize
