all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
The chlamydia really affected his face.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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