but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
