At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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