glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
