You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
