do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
i barfeds in our rink
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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