Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
