i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
What a dumb baby whore.
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
