Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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