And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
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