You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
