Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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