This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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