Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
