I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
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