We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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