pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
How many fucks given?
0.12846
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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