So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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