she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize