And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
i just google imaged poop.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
