At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
My dad is sitting where you rode me
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
