Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
