She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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