whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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