Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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