I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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