Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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