Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
