I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
