Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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