'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
