your thong is hanging out like whoa
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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