well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Hippo gnu deer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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