I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
You made out with two different species that night
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
