I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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