I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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