Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
So much Jack, so little girl.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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