IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
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