I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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