i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
