Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
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