i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.