Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...