ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Randomize
